Monday, January 24, 2011

The thing called love

I was just reading a friend's blog post on friendship and love and it sparked a thought not related to what imma say exactly but it sparked this line of thought. This is gonna seem kinda debatable and some of you probably arent gonna agree with me, but imma say it anyways. When people say they have 'fallen out of love' or ' i dont love you anymore' it's rubbish! Yes i said its garbage and a pile of bs, you can not loose real love, because love in its purest form is unconditional. Now some may say that unconditional love is only for those of the heavenly realm. I disagree, simply because its what you do with the love. God loves us unconditionally hence when we mess up He forgives us. Now for us humans you mess up and i may never talk to you again. But that doesnt mean that you dont love that person. And that 10 years later that person doesnt still have a piece of your heart. I didnt say you're gonna run off into the sunset together but you still love them. So if you say I no longer love this person then im sorry to say but i dont think you really did. Ya you said i love you felt butterflies yada yada, but maybe it wasnt, maybe its a common, yet tricky feelings between like and love.. highly infatuated? One says they 'fall in love' how can you 'fall out' of something you fell in? Can you fall out of a hole? Does that make sense?
You are thinking of your past relationships and saying oh but i did love him/her and now i dont. If you study and read about  the raw forms of love *see 1st corinthians 13* then its impossible to loose it, not so? It will always be there in your heart buried, it's whether you decide to act upon it or not that is another story, but it has to be there.
Now you may say oh but there's a difference between love and in love, yes but they cant be separate. Case in point you love someone but say you dont wanna be romantically involved anymore, cuz ur not 'in love' with them. So you are saying your feeling for them lessened? I loved you plenty now i love you a little bit?? Sounds contradictory when you put it like that right? Now hurt and other earthly factors will cause a person's desire to be around someone to falter, because love is not blind. And the reason you dont wanna be romantically involved at the core has nothing to do with love. The person may be proving to be somewhat of a bad choice or whatever, but it cant be because you love them less. Some may question well what about people who divorce after 25yrs claiming they have lost the spark, the love............. if they really loved each other its not gone, someone just messed up! Yes you can love someone and hurt them (humans do this), if you really love someone you must at some point feel remorse. Why, because at the baseline when u love someone hurting them consciously or unconsciously hurts you. If you dont, guess what! You didnt really love them!
No matter what if you really really really do love someone regardless of the choices you make, regardless of the mess they have created or the things they've done to you. You will always love them, always. Because that my friends is what love really is that attachment to someone's soul that is permanent.

Friday, January 21, 2011


Sometimes when the things most valuable to us become damaged we wrap them up in small boxes and put them high up on shelves away from feeble hands and care free spirits. It had never occurred to us that we can put our things so far away that we can't find them again. Or that even protection inside a box can't stop it from self destructing

Saturday, January 15, 2011

In Vain

'cause if you sacrificed everything, it'd better not be in vain'

ok so can we talk about this song! Wait first of all i have to give major props to Jazmine Sullivan her songs are always dead honest. She wants to break the windows out his car. Yes we all thought about it! She's in love with another man yep open, honest and straight to the point. She's not scared of lions, tigers and bears but she's afraid of love! Who isnt afraid of love! What a brilliant writer, please please dont leave music!!!
Ok back to the song! So from listening without paying attention one would assume she's wishing the best to the guy that left her. Hopes his new woman treats him well, in fact better, that he's happy etc. It's only when she says 'cause if you sacrificed everything, it'd better not be in vain' that i realised how subtly sarcastic this song is. She really isn't wishing you the best. She really doesnt mean 'i hope she's everything you want and everything I wasn't'  In fact she only hopes for your sake that it was worth it, that throwing away everything you built was worth it. Why? Well because it would have been in vain. Vain: not yielding the desired outcome. And the assumed desired effect would have been that the grass was greener on the other side, not so? Think of it as building a house from scratch and then falling for some wheeler dealer who has some cheap prefab houses. For your sake one would hope that this prefab doesnt fall apart because your other house has already been sold! 
Yes Jazmine you speak the unspoken words of many victims of love gone sour - 'cause if you sacrificed everything, it'd better not be in vain'

Monday, January 10, 2011


The other day it randomly crossed my mind how we hear all this push to fulfill our dreams, people write books on it, hold seminars to inspire the dreamers. I reflected on some of my dreams and realised how they had changed not because of fear or my own self but because of others. Now the sun shiney day optomist motivational speaker person will tell you that you shouldnt let people get in the way of your dreams...... right buddy! 
Think about it for a second now suppose your dream is to be a high level manager at some big corporation. Ok dream in focus, you work hard, harder than your peers, you go beyond the call of duty, do the usual sucking up etc, you're smart have all your degrees in check etc etc. What if for some reason there is someone in the higher ups that a) for some reason hates your guts. b) is screwing someone else who wants that position c) wont be leaving that position until they drop dead. Challenge right? Now unless you plan to do something illegal you either wait for karma to arrive or slowly come to the realisation that achieving your dream at this particular company may not be in the cards. Now you may leave and get to this level somewhere else. But what if this place meant something to you? Dream not achieved!
Now dont count me as a pessimist cuz hey something positive did happen just maybe not specifically the way you want it. What if some bad minded person had not wanted to see Oprah hosting a talk show? Im just saying....
I think we tend to run into life thinking this is what i want and this is how i want it and imma get it. That's good, dont get me wrong, but we must also say 'if its for me'. Because unfortunately every dream we have isnt for us or meant for us. Ah the part about life that's the hardest, knowing that you are not really in control. 'Sight beyond what I see, you know what's best for me.' Ya the Big Man upstairs is steering this ship, you say where you would like to go and then you stare at the horizon hoping its going where you want. If not, be not dismayed He's not taking you into danger :) 
Hence I dream and stare at the horizon. I would never stop dreaming, a person without dreams, well how do they live?  

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Peace and Blessing for 2011

And 2010 is over!!!! YES!!!!!
I have never been so nervous for the clock to strike midnight. I was so anxious for the year to change. I guess I associated my not so always pleasant experiences with the number on the calendar. There's always been this imaginary wall in my head that you hop over when the year changes. I couldn't wait on 1 hand to just hop over and run away as fast as I can. On the other hand all the emotions and disappointments couldnt help but to clutch onto me for 1 more time. The words of Queen Sheba's poem-It will pass - kept replaying in head 'I cant promise you the pain will stop tomorrow, or you wont burst into tears when the clock strikes New Years.' Since i heard that poem earlier in the year  I dreaded the inching of the clock's hands on December 31st. But guess what I did it :D ' Because it will pass like it always does, as time promises it will'
Now down to the purpose of this post!
Happy New Year to all my readers and friends. I sincerely pray for God's richest blessing upon your lives. I dont think this year wouldnt have been possible without the people that God has placed in my life. You all know who are you and how thankful I am for you :)
This year I look forward to possibly a children's book, yep I have to put my butt in gear.
Being a part of another 'When a Woman Moans' production, lol that's as far as I've gone into planning the new year.
I just look forward to more laughter, great times, success, growth, love *ermmm* lol and lighter blog posts!
I read this earlier this year and it inspired me hope it brings some peace to you as well.
'Green pastures are before me of which I have not seen.
Blue skies will soon be over me where darkest clouds have been
My hope I can not measure, my path to life is free
My Saviour has my treasure and He will walk with me'

Peace and blessing for 2011
From the Moondancer!