What I would tell my 16 year old self!

I just saw this on another blog and I had to do one myself. The post was called 'What would I tell my 17 year old self'. Imma use 16 seeing that's the age i was when i graduated high school and i thought it was a 'magical' age where life fell together....

• Being a drifter is ok, later on in life you will drift into things you never thought you would do. I suppose I thought i was different cuz at career day i dressed up as an adult cuz i had NO clue what i wanted to be, needless to say i was the only 'adult' at the event lol ... I totally blew in with the west wind into my current career path. 
• You are amazing just the way you are, trust me .....
• Everything that you think is running away actually isnt sooo slow down ... couldnt wait to be 18, little did i know that i was on a slow decline into adulthood and there aint no turning back! Bills and responsibility can wait!
• He is not end all, be all .... ah some lessons were learnt the hard way
• Not everyone behind your back has it .... real friends only show themselves when you least expect it 
• Stand in love dont fall in love... apparently you can see better that way, havent tried it yet I will get back to you. 
• That's just who you are not everyone will get it, but as long as you do that's all that matters
• Trust you gut its usually right
• You're a late bloomer, that just means your flower lasts longer! 
• Time works miracles on all wounds 
• You just made a not so silly mistake which will make sense many years later. And its ok this is still your worst mistake to date 
• Everyone doesnt show love in the same way, not everyone says it but you WILL just know who does
• You are smarter than you think and stronger than you believe 

What would you tell yourself?

Dear Disney

Dear Disney
I had the privilege of spending a few hours with some of your classics the other day. Alot of warm, fuzzy feelings came back to me as fond memories of my childhood infront of the tv resurfaced. 
But I have a few issues to bring up. Issues regarding the way you sort of us brainwashed us children with your princess, once upon a time, oh look the prince, happy endings stories. Now im not knocking kids stories, in no way should kids be depressed by the worries of life, but cant you be in the least bit realistic? Shall we examine some examples now? Yes, lets do that..
Sleeping Beauty - according to the disney version she was hidden away in the woods with the 3 fairy ladies until after her 16th bday. Now  before she randomly meets the prince in the woods. She tells the animals how she wants to meet a guy, how the fairy ladies never let her do that......hold up a second..if she was in isolation from birth how in the world does she know about boys???
The big tune for the movie was 'someday my prince will come'... yes, yes be hopeful that your prince will come someday even if you a 16 yr old hermit girl hidden in the woods. So at 16/17 Aurora found her prince and got married...What did we little girls learn? that 1st puppy love sweetheart is the one! not likely ....next........>
Cinderella- Cinderella. Cinderella. Cinderella. the biggest farce of them all!! Now i get the whole deeper meaning thing that ppl try to equate to this story. But honestly little girls dont think that hard. Girl goes to the ball falls 'in love' with a guy she dances with for like what an hour! They hardly spoke so he didnt fall in love with her stellar personality, but alas they had that 'love at first sight' thing. She bolts and he searches the whole kingdom for the girl with the 7.34 size foot (apparently that shoe only fits her) ya ya its magical, stop bursting little girl's bubbles blah blah..... On a side note Ever After is one of the fav movies solely because it is the most realistic version of the story. They met,have a relationship hence really fall in love as opposed to the wham bam thank you mam version of the story... like really!
Snow White- umm did she even know this dude before she fell into the poison induced coma? Boom pow he kisses her breaks the spell and alll is well they get married in the end right? Of course instantly!

And what did we learn young ladies? A prince always comes to save us at the end of the day.....right.... exactly!

But imma be fair and give Disney some props Ariel went after Eric, Pocahantas refused a 1 way trip to England and Mulan wanted honor before romance..... ah maybe the world is balanced! Cmon now i cant always be serious :)

The seasons of chemistry and a space shuttle

So its March and there's a few lessons I've learnt this year already and I thought I'd share them, cuz you never know it could be useful to you.
1) Sometimes people or circumstances come into our life for a reason and a season. They serve their purpose and that's all they will ever do. It makes absolutely no sense to hang onto these people/things longer than they are needed cuz as fate has it they are not meant to be in your life. So just let it go and smile that your prayer for help was answered. I actually heard this last year but learned the lesson recently! Yes some of us are hard headed!

2) Chemistry, a conversation with someone the other day made me ponder this term. I didnt go far in high school chemistry but i got the point that certain chemicals go well together, hence bonding to form something new. And certain chemicals dont go well together causing a horrible reaction, poof! explosion!
In context of the conversation people have chemistry thats what attracts them beyond looks. There has to be something within each person that causes an attraction factor to someone else regardless of looks,class, race. Ever saw a real hot person, enter into a convo with them and then just felt like soo whats on tv tonite cuz this person is bleh!
Or you start speaking to someone on a more personal level and find yourself quite interested in talking to them again and again and again.... hey what you doing tomorrow! Next thing you know a few days feels like a few years and you can feel almost safe to vouch and say hey we were totally sugar and kool aid in another life. That's chemistry my friends. You either got it or you dont!

3) Ok so i go by the whole mantra of dancing on the moon ^see about statement ^ and i admitted in previous posts that i can be a hypocrite. I get scared and punk out sometimes, alot........ Anyways I realised that although I tell myself dont be afraid just go for it. I still wanna get to the moon on a well crafted NASA space shuttle piloted by their best astronauts. Not on a busted, crash landed alien space thingy that people say will get me there. Yes this is a form of fear cuz not only do i wanna dance on the moon but I wanna get there in a guaranteed way. Also known as following paths already tread, staying with what works, what i know, what keeps me comfortable. Sitting behind NASA's best pilot is comforting imma fall asleep and know that i'll wake up on the moon. On the tin foil alien craft i gotta stay awake, checking oil gauges and praying that it doesnt fall out of the sky!
This whole line of thought brought me to the quote by Robert Frost

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Here's to the path less traveled!

Me!

While updating myself on my daily black celebrity gossip *shameful admission* I came across an article about a young woman who died because of a botched silicone implant operation on her backside. I posted it to facebook which sparked a range of comments which ended -quite surprisingly - into loving one's self and a few of my friends proceeded to mention what they loved about themselves. I wont pretend that when these topics come up I have to think for a good minute on what exactly I physically love. There are things over the years that i have come to greatly appreciate and love mainly because others have pointed it out over and over again. So ok ok yes I have a killer smile and im digging it. You know the kinda smile that's warm and friendly. The type that people sing about with sunbathed videos.
I no longer felt alone about the self doubt the day I watched Janet Jackson's interview on ABC like last year I believe. I sat aghast as this superstar who has been on countless billboards, posters, magazine covers etc could say that she is not that self confident. This woman whose body and face women envy could only list the small of her back as something she liked about herself. But at 40 something it was getting better....Ok so im 20 years younger so I'm in good shape.
I used to secretly hope every night that I would wake up with bigger breasts. I mean they starting growing with everyone else but stopped quite shortly after...hello down there 1 more cup please!!
Funny story i shared with a roommate once that i got fed up of being an A cup and proceeded to wear a B cup luckily for me they got the message and followed suit. She laughed because she did the same! *note well this doesnt work using pants! booo!!*
After awhile I started to kinda really like the A's cuz i could wear some pretty daring tops without a bra! Yes I realised I had a 1 up on the big booby girls.
Point of it all is to slowly figure things out and like em. And more importantly to admit that we all at some point put up a facade that hides what we really feel.
In conclusion Im not half bad!! I disappeared for a bit but imma soldier :)

Believe

The other day a friend of mine was talking about the jersey for the Manchester United team. He told me that on the inside of the jersey behind the crest was marked the word 'believe'. For some reason i sat and pondered the power of the word 'believe'. Think of it believe is one of the strongest words in a language. People are driven by belief everyone believes in something even if its nothing. Cult members believe that their leader is a god and they believe whatever he/she says even if it means dying. Stalkers believe that the person they stalk is in love with them and that they should be together. All religions are based on the belief and this belief influences actions at times actions that can be very extreme. People believe rumors so they pass them on, because they believe its true. Belief can result in obsession but it started as a belief. People enter contests with the belief that they will win, even when the odds are against them this belief repels them forward.
We all believe in something, its impossible to not believe in anything. The fact that you dont believe in anything shows that you put strong thought into thinking that nothing exists.  Stop for a moment and think of what you believe. And if you think you cant do something remember the word 'believe'

The thing called love

I was just reading a friend's blog post on friendship and love and it sparked a thought not related to what imma say exactly but it sparked this line of thought. This is gonna seem kinda debatable and some of you probably arent gonna agree with me, but imma say it anyways. When people say they have 'fallen out of love' or ' i dont love you anymore' it's rubbish! Yes i said its garbage and a pile of bs, you can not loose real love, because love in its purest form is unconditional. Now some may say that unconditional love is only for those of the heavenly realm. I disagree, simply because its what you do with the love. God loves us unconditionally hence when we mess up He forgives us. Now for us humans you mess up and i may never talk to you again. But that doesnt mean that you dont love that person. And that 10 years later that person doesnt still have a piece of your heart. I didnt say you're gonna run off into the sunset together but you still love them. So if you say I no longer love this person then im sorry to say but i dont think you really did. Ya you said i love you felt butterflies yada yada, but maybe it wasnt, maybe its a common, yet tricky feelings between like and love.. highly infatuated? One says they 'fall in love' how can you 'fall out' of something you fell in? Can you fall out of a hole? Does that make sense?
You are thinking of your past relationships and saying oh but i did love him/her and now i dont. If you study and read about  the raw forms of love *see 1st corinthians 13* then its impossible to loose it, not so? It will always be there in your heart buried, it's whether you decide to act upon it or not that is another story, but it has to be there.
Now you may say oh but there's a difference between love and in love, yes but they cant be separate. Case in point you love someone but say you dont wanna be romantically involved anymore, cuz ur not 'in love' with them. So you are saying your feeling for them lessened? I loved you plenty now i love you a little bit?? Sounds contradictory when you put it like that right? Now hurt and other earthly factors will cause a person's desire to be around someone to falter, because love is not blind. And the reason you dont wanna be romantically involved at the core has nothing to do with love. The person may be proving to be somewhat of a bad choice or whatever, but it cant be because you love them less. Some may question well what about people who divorce after 25yrs claiming they have lost the spark, the love............. if they really loved each other its not gone, someone just messed up! Yes you can love someone and hurt them (humans do this), if you really love someone you must at some point feel remorse. Why, because at the baseline when u love someone hurting them consciously or unconsciously hurts you. If you dont, guess what! You didnt really love them!
No matter what if you really really really do love someone regardless of the choices you make, regardless of the mess they have created or the things they've done to you. You will always love them, always. Because that my friends is what love really is that attachment to someone's soul that is permanent.

Valuables

Sometimes when the things most valuable to us become damaged we wrap them up in small boxes and put them high up on shelves away from feeble hands and care free spirits. It had never occurred to us that we can put our things so far away that we can't find them again. Or that even protection inside a box can't stop it from self destructing